Thou Shalt Covet

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When it comes to jealousy, this doesn’t have to be present only in relationships. You can feel envious about almost anything. When you see a friend wearing the shoes you’ve always wanted, you may feel a pang in your very gut. Admit it, there are some things that others have that you want. While you won’t say these things out loud, this doesn’t have to be a bad thing. Wanting is something that gets you to work hard, to do better.

You have to ask yourself, why were you jealous in the first place? Point out the many possibilities until one pick hits a nerve. The crux of the matter might actually be that you want their kind of life, the kind of success they’ve achieved. While you have other talents to offer, you can actually attain your dreams, but they may play out in a different scenario. So, look into what you can offer and see how this gets you to the top. Basically, you have to take the other person out of the picture and look inward. Connect the feeling of jealousy to something in your life you wish were different. You get envious with what really matters most. Your passion is telling you to go and get it. Just make sure you’re not over-idealizing the things you want. You need to practice the art of being realistic and come up with something that is aligned with your life right now. Just don’t go after everything that sparks a twinge of jealousy. Instead, look at the overall picture and see how life can become better for you.

You came, you saw, you were jealous…and you honed in on what you want. Now, you’re ready for action. When you actually see the thing you want or hear about it happening to someone, that goal begins to feel more real. As a result, you’re increasingly driven to pursue it. Simply dreaming is one thing, but when you witness someone else going for what you want, it suddenly feels like it’s within your grasp too, which gives you the push to go and get it.

Don’t be afraid to work the object of your envy for information about scoring what they have. Look at how they achieved your desire and what you can do to accomplish something similar. If possible, team up with them and watch them in action. In other words, look for mentors you actually admire. If they are a pro at something, stick by their side and observe how they operate. And though it may feel counterintuitive to the person you’re jealous of, asking for advice is really helpful.

Asking for their secrets helps you start your very own journey to success. Once you cop their tricks, people will start to admire you as well. In other words, channel that envy toward improving yourself. If there’s something you yearn for that you don’t have, zero in on it and decide to fix it. Soon enough you’ll realize that jealousy is actually a good thing.

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