Changing Your Life

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Everyone dreams of making their lives better, but for many, that’s where it ends. They just keep dreaming but don’t really do anything about it. You don’t want to be part of this group. Right now, you need to be proactive about making the changes and actually doing something about it. Wherever you are in life, there are always new things to learn, new wisdom to gain. Appreciate whatever it is that comes your way and know that this could be your opportunity to grow and realize what it is about life that makes it so special.

One way you can change your life is to actually try something new. Doing something out of the normal routine can be freeing. You may have toyed with the idea of making dramatic changes. Instead of just thinking about it, put it into action. Soon, you will feel like a brand new person. This inspires you to do more and to seek newer things. While the first few weeks of the change can be daunting, you’ll be able to adjust to the changes and see why this new life is actually better for you.

Sometimes, life throws you the unexpected. Instead of running for cover, it’s time that you embrace these changes and look for ways to make it fit. Let your imagination soar and bask in your newfound surprise. You may have some expectations, and more often than not, you don’t always get what you expect. Don’t fight it because sometimes, you have to be the chameleon and adjust to the new situation. This also helps you grow up faster. Acknowledge the fact that there are just some things that are out of your control, and once you accept the truth, it’s easier to adapt. These surprises are there to test your true strength and to see what kind of person you are. Don’t fail yourself by being resistant.

So, stop obsessing about the past and embrace what you have right now. You will see that the change is actually good. Don’t focus on the negative aspects. While this isn’t as simple as it sounds, you also have to know that there are things that you can actually be thankful for. When you stop fighting with your negative thoughts, you’ll also be more forgiving with yourself. You’ll see that the shift becomes more natural because you’ve set yourself to be flexible. Talk to a friend if you must and listen to the advice others give you. See what you can follow and be realistic about it. To be a better person and to be happier with where you are right now, you need to work at it. It’s challenging, but at least you’re trying to do something.

Right now, you can’t fight with what comes naturally. Commit yourself to improving your life. Come up with a list of things that will help you become a better person. Work on what you’ve written one at a time and see how much you can accomplish when you make it your responsibility to start the wonderful changes that could lead to a better you.

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Your Guide to Making Fast Cash

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You work hard and don’t even have time to relax, but still you find yourself strapped for cash. There’s something wrong with this picture, and while this isn’t to say that you just up and leave everything, you need to find ways that help you better cope with the financial expenses. First of all, make sure that your bosses know you’re an integral cog in the organization wheel. Though many of the companies have been downsizing, you still need to find ways wherein your job is never at risk. You not only save your career, but you also let the big dogs know that if anyone deserves a promotion and a salary raise, then that person would be you.

Then, create a network of business associates. Reconnect with people who can help you hone your skills. And let them know that if they do come up with a great idea, they should let you know about it. Ask around and keep their suggestions in mind. If you feel the need to take your skills elsewhere, at least you have several options on standby. Also, it is important to research on what you can do. You can actually put your talents and skills to good use and earn from them. If you love to cook, start with a bake sale and tell your friends to help spread the word. If you love math, you can post an ad and tutor a student in need. Contact schools within your area and ask them if you can post an ad on their bulletin board. You can always fix your schedule so that you can do this after work.

Another great idea is to clean house and sell your old belongings. As long as these are still in decent condition, there is always someone in need of it. To sell these items, you can hold a massive garage sale. There’s strength in numbers and your chances of earning will be much higher if you get other people to join. Combine those items and talk about the selling prices. If you have very expensive shoes and clothes that you feel are worth much more than the prices posted on garage sales, you can always put them up for bidding on eBay or any other auction sites. You need to be willing to part with them, and if you haven’t worn them in years, tell yourself that keeping them is simply a waste of space. Take pictures of what you want to sell, upload them onto your computer and sign up as a member with an auction site. Because these are expensive items in good condition, set a minimum asking price as well.

While these aren’t permanent solutions to your dilemma, they do help with your savings. Set aside what you earn, and if the amount is quite substantial, you can always invest in stocks or put it on time deposit. This way, you know that you could actually earn interest from all that hard work.

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Prepare for a Rushed Presentation

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Your boss enters your workplace and looks at you with a twinkle in his eyes. He excitedly tells you that he just talked to a client and they are interested in knowing more about your project. Your boss then drops the bomb and says that you will be presenting to them in an hour. You get suddenly tense and feel the pressure building up. A good presentation could very well be the key to a successful sale. You have some standard presentation materials but it might not be appropriate for the client. What kind of presentation could bring in the sale? Here are some suggestions to help you prepare for the presentation.

Check who the audience will be. There may be other people joining the presentation that act as advisors to the client. They may be the key people who will assist your client in making the final decision. The major consideration in any presentation is knowing your audience. Check on who are the audience. Find out who are the key people and their level of expertise or knowledge on the subject matter.

Pay heed to the other people attending the presentation. The other members in the audience may not be decision makers but they may be the technical people who will provide the inputs for the executives’ decision. Ask yourself “What is the audience looking for in the presentation”. Presentations sometimes take on a shotgun approach and show everything. Based on the reaction of the audience, the presenter then drills down to their interests. This is workable if you have a lot of presentation materials on different aspects of the project and you and the audience have the time to go through a lot of subjects before concentrating on specific topics. A shotgun approach may not be possible for a rushed presentation. Once you know audience, you can prepare your speech and the presentation materials.

Some people like simple desktop presentations while others prefer presentations using high-tech video and audio equipment. The type of presentation is vital as people can get turned off from the very start and leave immediately, regardless of their interest on the topic. Knowing the audience helps you establish the type of presentation that will bring in their attention. Work out how you will start and end the presentation. A good beginning makes the audience feel confident that you are in control and know what you are presenting. Knowing what the audience is looking for will help you establish the ending of the presentation. Your ending message should drive home the point and close the deal. Keep the presentation simple.

Focus on what the audience wants to know about. Don’t give more information than necessary. An information overload might disrupt the flow of thought and confuse the audience. Make a short outline on what you will present and discuss. It can serve as a guide and reference and help you avoid deviating from the subject.  Think everything out thoroughly and imagine how the presentation will proceed.  If you’ve thought it out carefully, it will be a good presentation regardless of your rush to prepare for it.

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Living with Less

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Times have certainly become tougher, but that doesn’t mean you have to deprive yourself from life’s simple pleasures. You just have to come up with ways to better survive the economic crisis the world is going through. Downsizing and layoffs are scary, but you’re not the only one experiencing these things. In fact, some have it even worse. It may take months, or even years, before you see an improvement with the economy, and while this is out of your control, you can do something about your life. It’s all about managing your money because you just don’t know if you’ll lose your job or get hit by unexpected expenses.

Be a savvier spender. It’s not about taking a nosedive and just living your life differently. Just make sure you set aside for savings and think up of new ways in which you can enjoy your hard-earned cash and still have enough for those rainy days. Give yourself time to establish your career. The older you are, the more devastated you can be when you get hit by the crisis, and that’s because you’ve put more effort into getting where you are right now. Well, as long as you still have the energy to get out of bed each day, your chances of surviving are pretty good.

If you’re living on your own, maybe it’s time to get a roommate. You can always ask a friend, but make sure that you still respect each other’s privacy. You can also ask your pals if they know of anyone looking for a place on a budget. Also, you need to trust the person you’ll be sharing your pad with. This is your safe haven, and if you have trust issues with your roomy, it’s time to get him or her to move out. Get the details straight and make arrangements as to how you’ll split the bills. It’s always a good plan to set aside a date where you can shuffle through the bills together and split the payment responsibilities.

When it comes to anything in your life, it is always good to hope for the best but prepare for the worst. Should the ax fall on you, you won’t be as devastated, and that’s because you’ve already come up with plans for yourself. Always start building a sort of financial cushion. This means that you put away a certain percentage of your monthly income and deposit the amount in the bank. Keep the card at home so you won’t have the option of hitting the next ATM if you want to splurge on something. This is a separate account for you, and as for the rest, you have something to use for your shopping and eating needs. Always talk to a bank representative on what you should do. He will be able to give you advice.

While the economy is performing poorly, don’t act the same way with your job. Make them know that you’re an indispensible part of the economy. That way, when it comes to downsizing, your name will never part of the list.

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Move up the Success Ladder

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Success doesn’t always happen overnight. Sure, there are people that gain success in a moment’s notice but those are very rare occasions. The more common success stories are those of people that worked hard and accomplished their goals and objectives despite constant hardships and arduous challenges. It’s a long climb to success but can be achieved if you put your mind and heart to it. Here are a few comments that may help your climb to success.

Watch for golden opportunities. There are a number of opportunities that pass by each person. Some might not recognize it as an opportunity while others see the opportunity but are disheartened and overwhelmed by the work that needs to be done with relation to the opportunity. Once you see an opportunity, grab it and take on whatever work needs to be done to accomplish the objectives. Achieving success is a long process and every opportunity you grab and complete satisfactorily is a step up the ladder of success. Work is never easy. It just seems easy if you enjoy it. You may encounter work that is not enjoyable. Take it on and accept whatever pain comes with the job. All those experiences will help make you a better person.

Take on challenges as they come along. The challenges in itself may not offer any opportunity but that should not deter you from tacking the work. Undertaking challenges will help build up your character and prepare you for other tasks. Don’t be selective in your jobs. Take on whatever job is assigned to you and complete it successfully. People will notice your performance and will consider you for jobs with greater responsibilities. They will consider you as a reliable and responsible person who can get the job done regardless of difficulties. Remember that it’s not who you know but who knows you and your capabilities. Go the extra mile. Jobs can be completed successfully by a lot of people but very few will go the extra mile in completing those jobs. Look for the extra mile and go for it. People will recognize you as an achiever and earmark you as a potential candidate for critical jobs.

Don’t wait for everything to fall into place before grabbing the opportunity. People sometimes wait for the right moment or more resources before stepping forward. Be proactive and do whatever needs to be done to get the job moving. Always aim for the best. You don’t have to achieve perfection all the time but aiming for it will bring out the best in you. Your attitude and determination are felt by your co-workers and may inspire them to do extraordinarily well in their work.

Anticipating and grabbing opportunities are good but at times you may have to create your own opportunity. Write down your long and short terms to success. Set your action plans to accomplish those goals. Your actions and activities may bring about the opportunities you need to climb the ladder of success. Don’t rest on your laurels. There are other opportunities lying around. Take hold of them.

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Dating Pains

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Dating is a lot like puberty. You have to test your will and patience so you can come out of it unscathed. This is applicable not just to the younger generation of the society. Even the older individuals have to go through the teething stages of dating in order to make the relationship work, or at least flourish for a while. If you’re not getting asked out for another date, or worse, not getting asked at all, you may have to look deeper into yourself to see what messages you’re sending to those guys.

Sure, you go out and then they promise that they’ll call. You practically wait beside the phone, but as usual, they didn’t push through with their promise. That can be disheartening and extremely disappointing. You call your friends and ask for their take on the situation, but the truth is, you need to get the opinion of a man in order to understand a man.

Usually the problem can lie on the way you dress. Are you putting an ensemble together to impress the fashionistas instead of catching a man’s attention? Women usually assume that what’s cute for them is also the same for the man. Your goal is to lure the man in, like a fisherman to a hook. Men aren’t as conscious with brands. What they really want to see is that wonderful figure underneath that dress. You don’t have to look skanky to make this possible. You need to leave room for imagination and not cry out desperation in the clothes you wear.

As for your conversations, remember that the first time can be a little bit tricky, and more importantly, somewhat awkward. Maybe out of sheer nervousness, you tend to give out too much information. If you reveal too much of yourself all in one go, your date could end up feeling uncomfortable. Or, sometimes talking too much can just be plain annoying. Keep that impulse to over-share in check by following some set guidelines you can come up with. The story should be no more than two minutes, and the topic should never circle around your mother or your supervisor at work. If you don’t want him to make plans that don’t involve you, talk about something that he can easily relate to. The more personal stuff can come as the relationship progresses.

As you get to know the guy, try not to be too engrossed with your phone. Sending messages to someone else while you’re on a date is simply disrespectful. People even consider it a taboo even when you’re just out with friends. Live in the now and try to keep communication with the others at a minimum. Then, politely excuse yourself and apologize for that minute you’ll need to make a short reply. In the early stages on dating, the less you’re involved with technology, the better it’ll be for the two of you. The same rule applies with the guy you’re with. Don’t come out too assertive by constantly sending him text messages. Until you’ve bonded, online and phone conversations are best set aside. What you need right now is face to face interaction.

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Honing Your Acceptance Speeches

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You may be called upon one day to receive an award or a plaque in recognition of your accomplishments. Are you ready to accept the award with due humility and sincere gratefulness? Being invited to a luncheon or dinner event in your honor leaves no doubt that they will be presenting an award to you during the auspicious occasion. Organizers normally inform the celebrants beforehand so they have sufficient time to prepare their acceptance speech. It is embarrassing and at times considered rude not to inform the affected persons. Having been duly forewarned, you can now take steps to be forearmed. Here are a few suggestions to help you prepare for your earthshaking speech.

Make the speech meaningful and relevant to the occasion. Practice your speech in front of a mirror or with the family and friends. If you are not accustomed to standing in front of an audience, now is the time to practice. It is not easy to stand in front of many people and give a speech while looking at the audience. Some people end up having stage fright and freeze at that moment. This is your moment and you should not waste it by standing there in a dumb-stricken manner. One technique is to single out one or two people from the audience and direct your speech to those selected people. Don’t make it obvious though. Scan the audience left to right but eventually rest your eyes on those one or two persons. It may ease your nerves and subconsciously you will not realize the number of people that you are addressing.

Give due recognition to the people who helped you in your accomplishments. In acknowledging the people, try to formulate some logical sequence, such as order of rank or position in society. People worked hard to earn their position in society. Give them due consideration. If your accomplishments were due to a team effort, make sure that each member of the team gets an equal chance to voice their acceptance or if time is of the essence, agree among yourselves on who should be making the acceptance speech for the team.

Have notes ready and refer to them as often as needed. It is noteworthy to deliver the speech from memory but you might forget mentioning a name or a vital incident in relation to your accomplishments. This is your time to mention everyone and everything you want. Check the notes to make sure you haven’t missed out on anything. But remember to keep looking at the audience. There is nothing worse than just reading the whole speech without looking at the people sitting in front of you. The notes are just ticklers to remind you of names, occasions and key words or phrases. It should not be the whole speech. Make sure your notes are legible and readable from a distance. Write your notes on small index cards which are easy to pull out and hide away. Be sincere and thankful for the award. Be clear and concise in showing your gratefulness. Having humor in the speech is a good icebreaker but too many jokes can also get tiring.

Lastly, watch the time. The people granted you time to deliver your acceptance speech. Don’t abuse and exceed it. People get turned off with a lengthy verbose speech.

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Letting Your Relationship Rise

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When you’re with someone, you’ll experience ups and downs. Some days will go by smoothly, while the other days just seem too difficult to endure. Of course, the economic crisis only makes matters worse. You just don’t know what’s going to happen to you tomorrow and if your job will still remain stable. All those issues can take their toll in every aspect in your life. When you don’t know what to expect, you become antsy, and while you can consider yourself a calm person, the uncertainty will take its toll on you, and this will become apparent with your closest relationships as well. You take out your frustrations to your loved one because you think he will be the one who understands you the most.

The truth is, the constant attack is simply unhealthy. You’re supposed to have each other’s back when things become too tough. Fights send the wrong message, and the constant venting will take its toll. So if you’re really irritated and want a way to express your frustrations, go and hit the gym first. As for your man, he should probably do the same thing. No matter how hard you try to be pleasant, you can falter at times. The point here is to avoid those situations and apologize when you slip. Clear the air whenever you can so that nothing turns into an all-out war.

And while you may be strapped for cash right now, you and your loved one should never give up the dreams you have as a couple. Of course, you don’t have to force yourselves to splurge when you know that’s not possible for the moment. Put your dreams on hold for now, and find ways to play out your dreams on a smaller scale. You just have to e a little more practical for now, but you still need to dream big. When you know that there’s so much in store in the future, the present can become more bearable. Plus, you two won’t feel as if you’ve also put your relationship on hold.

Continue to make plans and talk about the things you can do to make that future possible. Talking about the things that have yet to happen can be an exhilarating and rewarding experience. You’ll feel as if you’ve never gotten out of synch and that you’re still thinking about how to make each other happy. Even if your plans are still not feasible, talking about them is perfectly fine. In a way, it’s like telling your man that you still believe in an amazing future as a couple. And while the money issues can be frustrating, it’ll feel better knowing that you have someone helping you through all of it.

Capture the spirit of all your hopes and aspirations. And if that big future seems too far, do little things that make your relationship more special. When you look back, you’ll see that it’s actually those little gestures that have made the relationship that you have worthwhile.

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Its All in the Mind

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While opportunity does knock every now and then, time will be your greatest enemy. The ticking of the clock means that you’re another second further from your goals. Soon, you’ll realize that you haven’t accomplished much. You don’t want to live a life filled with regret, and this means that you live every moment the best way you know how. Sure, this sounds too easy, especially when you encounter problems. When life pulls the rug from underneath your feet, you just want to sulk in your misery. You can only get past the dilemma when you’ve cried your eyes out. Of course you can do that, but you also need to pull yourself up and continue on. Grieve for a time and then make a promise to yourself that you’ll work at making your life better.

One way to do that is to have enough energy to experience the different adventures. This is when you’re health comes into play. So, set goals and work on your body. Just because you no longer have the body you once enjoyed doesn’t mean that you close the doors. Your story is yet to be told, and you can change the ending to make it a happier one. In this new chapter, start fresh. Don’t put off your activities and do what you can while you still are able to do it. You’ll never know what tomorrow will bring, and if something unwanted happens, you will always think about that what-if moment. It’s hard to believe in yourself, but when you see yourself moving toward that direction, the feeling becomes more real. Make small goals and when you complete something, that’s a step closer to the better. This gives you the will to push further and do more.

Don’t wait too long. The more you do nothing, the more impossible things will seem. If you have to force yourself to get out of bed, make a list of things you’ll enjoy when you become fitter. Pumping some iron builds your bones and muscles, tones your body, and helps you feel more active. If going to the gym isn’t your thing, enroll in a dance class or join the tennis team. Whatever it is, at least you’re burning calories. Involve your friends so that the exercise will be more like a social activity. Make sure that these are people who want you to look your best so they push you further when you feel like giving up. Then, reward yourself with a new outfit whenever you lose five pounds. That way, you also will feel good because you fill into those outfits better.

While it’s good to exercise, know that rest is just as important. Take a break because a burnout is just as dangerous. When you rest from all those rigorous routines, you will be able to push yourself further next time. A day off gets you ready for the next activity, plus, you also have something to look forward to after the workout. Allow your body to recover because it is when you’re relaxed that you heal faster.

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Going Through Life Flying Solo

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There are times in your life where you’re in between relationships. Sadly, most women have been taught to aspire for that fairy tale ending. Sadly, real life gets in the way, and in the end, you find yourself flying solo. Whenever you get together with someone you haven’t in years, you always get asked about your love life. Do you have a boyfriend? And if you answer no, they immediately assume that you’re picky. But what’s wrong with being picky? You’re entitled to choose the person you could be with for the rest of your life. No one should ever settle if they want a chance at happiness. So if flying solo for now is what you need, then be proud about where you are now in life.

Society expects a woman’s life to be much like those tales from long ago: boy and girl meet, fall deeply in love, and live happily ever after. After all, the girls in the fairy tales you grew up with always ended up with the man of their dreams. Some people just expect you to get married and actively look for that man who will eventually give you the family you’ll be nurturing. Basically, a single person is a lonely person. Little do these narrow-minded individuals realize that the number of unattached women is rising. Of course, this isn’t to say that this is a much better choice. Not at all! It’s more on being happy with who you are and being okay about where life brings you.

If you put your career first, then do so. At least you know that once you’ve settled down, you’ve lived your life to the fullest. There’s just so much in life you have yet to see, and sometimes, it’s better that you go through the stages on your own. You learn independence, and you’ll also get to realize that you are capable of taking care of yourself. Nonetheless, finding satisfaction in single-blessedness isn’t always easy. It gets even harder when society expects so much from you. It may also be due to that fact that people have romanticized the whole thing. Just remember that you entered the world on your own, and you can thrive in it on your own as well.

There are plus and bonuses to wherever you are in life. When you’re married, you always have someone to come home to, always have that person who cares for you more than anyone else. When your single, you don’t need to worry about anyone else when you make decisions, and when you go out and enjoy yourself, you don’t feel guilty about doing what you want. There’s just so much to do either way, and when you’re okay with where you are, people will get to see that confident person living her life to the fullest.  Just be in control with who you are and know that life still has a few surprises up in its sleeve just for you. In time, you’ll see that when you don’t have regrets, you have a life well lived.

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Making Your Diet More Pleasant

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You’re on a diet, but there’s a party coming up. Because you feel that you have to resist temptation, you opt to stay at home instead. You don’t have to live life like a recluse when you go on a diet. There will always be parties, and whatever season it may be, you still owe it to yourself to go out and enjoy life normally. You can revel each moment without worries eating at you. All you need to do is come up with the right strategies so you can still work on that body as you enjoy the different events.

Stop feeling as if you’re doomed to gain weight. Panic won’t do you good. In fact, the feeling could actually backfire. If you’ve got it in your mind that you’re going to pack pounds, you are more likely to binge out and live with the regret when you get home. Create an action plan so you can ease away the stress, fear, and anxiety. Just come up with a rule. Say you allow yourself a dessert this week and continue the diet on a Sunday instead, a day when you usually allow yourself to splurge a bit. When you come up with a way to make up for one night, you’ll feel a lot better. Or, another good plan would be to add another few minutes in your usual workout routine. Whenever there are parties, it’s always easy to stuff yourself and become a glutton. Don’t let each bite ruin your night. Think about your goal and see if what you’ll do is worth the regret you’ll feel the day after. Just allow yourself a taste and then move on to the next activity.

To make those diets easier, you need a day when you can treat yourself to your favorite dessert or sinful meal. The key here is to do everything in moderation. Chew slowly and give your stomach time to signal to your brain that it’s had enough. If you’re the one throwing the party, make sure to keep the leftovers well-refrigerated. Or, you can send them home to your guests. When you put the remainder in your fridge or freezer, you aren’t likely to overeat because you know that you still have tomorrow to enjoy many of what you’ve prepared.

Of course, there are also those who just serve you with endless amounts of food. You can turn them down without being rude. Ask for a small piece and say that you’re already full. However, thank them profusely as well. When the host sees that you just can’t take any more, he or she is more likely to drop it. Plus, quit the ‘I’ve got to indulge now’ attitude. Anticipating what you’re about to give up usually makes you crazy. Work on a balance and think about how much faster it’ll be to get to your goal if you start right now. Plus, don’t think of what you’re going through as a diet. To keep that weight off for good, you need to see it more as a lifestyle change.

Trouble losing weight? Get the facts on Weight Loss

Make Those Small Changes

 

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Sometimes, it’s the small things that reap big results. And when it comes to personal fitness and health, you need to ditch the dieting sledgehammer and learn to eat healthy. Start with one meal at a time and work your way up from there. That way, you will reap the benefits eventually. Don’t go by the belief that if you eat like a bird, you’ll lose weight. Because when you live your life that way, you won’t keep the weight off. The saner way to becoming healthy is all about making small, permanent changes that lead to a better looking you. There are simple solutions that make losing weight while meeting all your nutritional needs doable instead of daunting. From breakfast to dinner, you can get in shape without going crazy and turning into someone obsessed with avoiding temptations.

Upgrade your breakfast and reap the benefits by not blowing off your first meal of the day. You consume fewer calories throughout, and you very well are aware of the fact that several studies have proven that breakfast is actually the most important meal. But the problem with a high-sugar meal is that you aren’t kept satisfied for long periods of time. What you need right now is a healthy grab-and-go starter that will pump you full of energy and make you forget about eating in between your breakfast and lunch. Try a high calorie breakfast that mixes fiber and protein.

Then, you can turn lunch into an explosion of all wonderful flavors. Your midday meal is what sets the rest of your afternoon. If you don’t choose the right food combination, you can trip over the road to a healthier you. Again, choose something that contains plenty of protein, fiber, and water to make them filling. A great choice would be a gourmet salad. Make different combos to make it interesting and then drizzle it with a vinaigrette dressing just before eating. To satisfy a dessert craving after consuming your bowl of greens, finish it off with a healthy treat of grapes or cherries, or even a cup of yogurt. If you still get the afternoon munchies, bring a bag of high fiber cookies. This should satisfy you until dinner time.

You can maximize your nighttime meal as well. Most people blow their calorie budget by inhaling anything they find after work. The simple and quick fix to this would be to eat an evening meal so satisfying that it’s much like a preemptive strike on snack attacks. That means that your final meal of the day consists of lean protein coupled with fiber-rich whole grains and mixed vegetables. Even a kitchen rookie will be able to assemble a dish that meets these requirements. Just add canned veggies or bagged salad to create a complete meal. Then, drink some fruit tea as dessert. If you crave for an alcoholic beverage after, a glass (or two) of dry wine’s full flavor should stop you from drinking quickly. Aside from that, you aren’t likely to pour another glass.

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Guy-Proof Your Diet

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You’d exchange numbers with a man you met and suddenly the gym called your name, chocolate lost its mind-control power and dressing on the side became a stock phrase. But since the relationship progressed to something more serious, you’ve somewhat seen the numbers on your scale slowly creep up. If you’ve always suspected that love actually makes you fat, you can now start feeling vindicated. Studies and experience must have shown you that you’ve been eating foods that are higher in sugar and fat, and at the same time, you’ve been exercising less. Your male partner is lucky because they burn 26 percent more calories than women. So, you’re actually the one piling up on pounds. And given that the male diet includes guiltlessly scarfing down the most calorie-dense, fat-laden meals, you really will gain weight.

Lucky for you, you don’t have to stay away to lose your very own love handles. So, what if he doesn’t eat vegetables? Does that mean you shouldn’t too? The damage is that fewer vegetables mean more of everything else. Trade one cup of carrots or broccoli for rice, and you’ve suddenly added more than a hundred calories. Well, you can at least try to get him to go green. So while your guy might not realize that tomato sauce alone doesn’t fill his quota, he also isn’t likely to object if you send some chopped salad his way. Force yourself to throw some pre-chopped veggies into the supermarket cart. Then, mix them with pasta or experiment with a variety of salad dressing. It’s all about experimenting here.

How about his non-stop munching during prime-time shows? If only yelling at the screen during football season were his worse habit. Turns out, you lose track of what you eat with other shows as well. The more you’re into what’s played on the tube, the less aware you are of how much potato chips you’ve inhaled. Well, no one can resist delicious treats that are right in front of them. First, you’re better off watching a boring sports event than a show that’s easy to love. Maybe you can just fill a bowl with some light microwave popcorn to munch away. That’s a whole lot less than any of the junk you’ve been enjoying.

Moreover, you don’t need statistics to tell you that men like knocking back a cold one, chugging a beer regularly. Of course, he hates to chug alone and you’ve become his de facto buddy. Alas, even a low fat beer can do damage. Enjoying a beer with him at dinner isn’t worth the calories, but you don’t have to give up the tasty malt goodness altogether. Just skip it on weeknights. Chances are, you’ll enjoy the alcohol more if you save those calories for a mini-splurge at a future happy hour or a weekend out. And when you need to bounce back from a killer day, have a massage instead. That way, you enjoy your togetherness without sacrificing the body you’ve worked hard for.

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Learning the Art of Retention

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You took on the challenge of speed reading. You’re now capable of reading at a fast rate while retaining a sufficient amount of information. You’ve taken endless speed reading exercises to improve your retention but you feel there is still room for expansion. Here are some suggestions to further increase your retention.

Make margin notes or highlight critical portions in a page. There may be some sentences or paragraphs that are vital to the content. You may have retained the information subconsciously but marking a page somehow increases the recall factor. The highlighter is a good tool but writing it down in your own words might make it easier to remember. If the book does not belong to you, make the notes on a separate piece of paper. Indicate the pages that the notes are referring to. Sometimes the author may repeat the message in different sections of the book. Maintain a single note but identify the pages where the message was mentioned. This may turn out to be the whole theme of the book.

Dog-ear pages. Dog-earing refers to turning down a corner of the page in a book or magazine. You could write down the page numbers or put book markers on these pages but dog-ear is easier and more convenient. The problem with dog-ear is that somebody might remove the dog-ears accidentally and you lose all trace of that information. You may have to go through each page and check the corners for creases. A creased corner is an indication of a probable dog-ear. Determine the important pages that need dog-ears. Be selective. Dog-ears are not effective if you end up putting a dog-ear on every other page. When you finish, re-visit the dog-eared pages. There shouldn’t be many if you selected properly. It will bolster the essence of the book in your mind. Dog-ears are not advisable if the book is not yours since it damages the page and ruins the overall appearance of the book. In such cases, you will need to resort to bookmarkers or sticky index markers which can be removed later on without damaging the pages.

Write key notes on a separate paper. This may be similar to summarization except that you are focused on the key items. Referring to the key notes will help make you remember the main message of the book. Reference to the notes helps the retention process. In some cases, writing an ‘abstract’ in your own words may be a better retention method. Since it is in your own words, the chances of remembering it is greater. Some people have photographic memories and retention poses no problems to them. For the majority, they will have to undergo some method to improve their retention levels.

Speed reading requires constant practice. But that is just one side of the coin. Understanding and retaining what you read is the other side. Keep up with the speed reading lessons and take the retention tests regularly. You will build up your retention skills in a short time.

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Don’t be a Wallflower

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A wallflower has different connotations. In our case, we look at a wallflower as a shy or reserved person. A shy person has less chances of making it in the world because they don’t apply their communication skills effectively. If you are a shy person, it’s time to come out of your shell. It is through proper communication that you get to know people and more importantly, people begin to notice you. There are various reasons for shyness, such as nurturing feelings of intimidation or not knowing what to say. Your feelings of intimidation may be imaginary. It is rare that people who have never met you will immediately want to bully or browbeat you. Your feelings may be indications of personality introversion and may have emanated from genetic traits or the environment. Try consulting a doctor and trace the causes for your shyness. Whatever the reason, shyness can be overcome. Start by meeting people and striking up a short conversation with them. If they don’t wish to talk, that’s fine. Don’t pursue it. There are many other people around that may be willing to talk with you, even for a short while. Here are some tips on opening up a conversation.

Be courteous and polite. Show your desire to have a pleasant short talk with them. You can start by complimenting them. They will listen to you because people usually like to hear nice things said about them.  Be careful on your remarks. Saying her obesity brings out the beautiful colors in her dress might not be appreciated by the person even if you were trying to compliment her on her choice of dress. A compliment should not contain hidden innuendoes. Be careful when you give compliments. They might feel you are just giving them a “pick up” line or you want something from them. Give your compliments wholeheartedly. Demonstrate to the person that you really appreciate what you praise. A good compliment may be “I had to just tell you I like your shirt. Where did you get it?”.

Once the conversation starts up, try to find something that can serve as a bridge between the two of you. It may be a hobby, type of work, organizations they are members of, or other types of interests. There is a large variety of topics and hopefully, you will chance on a subject matter of common interest. The only limitation is your amount of curiosity. It may help if you mention your work and some of the things you enjoy doing. Don’t talk too much about yourself. People tend to lose interest when the conversation becomes an ego trip. Once you have a common subject, explore their interests. Find out their opinions and feelings on the subject. Focus on the similarities you share with the other person.

Show sincerity in your conversation. Be open and candid. Don’t feign interest on the subject matter. As the conversation progresses, your disinterest or limited knowledge will show and your partner will notice it. Don’t give asinine remarks. Be tactful and cognizant of the other person’s feelings and opinions. Listen carefully and understand what they are telling you. End the conversation in a gentle and courteous manner.  Saying “I really enjoyed talking to you” and thanking them can be a joyful conclusion to a fruitful conversation. Practice slowly and build up your confidence.

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Controlling Your Sweet Tooth

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If you can commit to eating well for a fixed amount of time, you can actually be on your way to a better you. The key to ultimate weight loss is to kick those stubborn little urges to curb. Nobody likes a nag, but somehow, the sweets hidden in your pantry keep calling your name. You feel like you have to give in if you want them to shush. A craving, after all, is like a little devil that constantly encourages you to indulge. And dieting only turns up the pressure. If you start restricting the calories, the more likely you are to give in. And you know that if you keep bending to temptation, your clothes won’t eventually hug your body as well, and this could be your personal hell.

The good news is that these unhealthy tormentors can be fended off. Cravings are all about your blood sugar, and if your levels stay consistent throughout the day, your eating patterns will follow as well. It’s when you starve yourself for hours at a time that the cravings call. Your blood sugar can fall too low after just a few hours of not eating. So, you search the fridge, the pantry, and even the mall for simple carbohydrates that give you a quick boost. Trouble is that the resulting blood sugar spike triggers your pancreas to release insulin, a hormone that not only lowers blood sugar but also signals your body to run through the craving cycle over and over again. This reinforces the binge because the crash makes you crave for sugar and starch once more. In other words, giving in to eating carbs only leaves you eventually wanting for more.

One reason most diets fail is that long-term goals can be deceptively difficult. When the plan is to watch what you eat for the next several months, chugging one big creamy shake seems like a minor slip. To avoid that mind frame, commit to only a fixed amount of time that you’re full confident you can manage. Once you make it to your goal date, rest for only a bit and then start over. This establishes the notion that you can be successful and gives you a chance to notice that eating better makes you feel better, reinforcing your desire to continue.

If the main purpose of your diet is purely aesthetic, you’re unlikely to stick with it for the long haul. The solution would be to arm yourself with additional motivators. Keep a daily journal in which you monitor migraines, heartburn, acne, and other problems. Discovering that your new diet improves the quality of your life and health is powerful. Okay, so what if you overindulged one afternoon? The next step would be to simply forget about it. One meal doesn’t define your diet, so don’t immediately assume you’ve fallen off the wagon and just quit for the time being. Follow at least one cheat meal with five healthy ones. This means that you’ll be eating right for most of the time, and that would mean a world of difference.

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Communicate By Listening

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People practice endlessly their verbal and non-verbal communication skills. They learn proper sentence structures and new words daily. They go through the non-verbal actions, observing their facial expressions and body movements. It doesn’t matter what is being said as long as their movements are properly orchestrated. This attitude may backfire. Your movements and responses reflect the amount of awareness you gave to the ongoing conversation. If you don’t listen attentively, you may be saying asinine comments or your body movements might not be apropos to the subject matter. For example, if people were showing remorse for the lives lost in the Iran war, it would not be proper to smile or act smug. Proper attitudes and brilliant remarks can be achieved by listening well to the discussions. Here is some help to help improve your listening prowess.

Start listening and not hearing. You can hear people talking but until you learn to listen, you will not understand what is being discussed. Listening involves focusing your attention to the speakers, understanding what they are saying and responding appropriately at the right time. There are times the subject matter may be boring to you. However, the speaker may be enthusiastically interested on the topic. You should pay attention to them out of courtesy if not for anything else. Try to find a way to excuse yourself later but for the meantime, listen well and be attentive. Aside from verbal communication, make sure that your actions reflect your undivided attention to the speaker. It would be rude if you start looking around or doing other things while the person is talking to you. Non-verbal communication can bring home the message more effectively than talking. Be careful of your actions and avoid distractions.

If you have pending appointments , explain to the person why you need to cut short the conversation and set another time and place to continue the discussions. If the person feels an urgency regarding the matter and insists on talking, try to get to the gist and possibly provide some suggestions which may help the person. Mention that you’ll think of other options which you can discuss with him at a later time. Don’t suggest a date or time too far in the future.

Don’t presume what the person will say and cut them off. Let them speak. Don’t argue with them. Each person should be allowed to voice their thoughts and opinions. Be objective and professional. Explain to the person whether your comments are based on fact or speculations.  Sometimes arguments ensue based on hearsay or suppositions and this can lead to destructive conversations and endanger any harmonious relationship you may have with the other persons.

After having listened to the person, reiterate what was said to make sure that it was understood correctly. Seek clarifications on vague statements. If you are not familiar with the subject matter, tell them at the soonest possible time without rudely interrupting them. Everyone will appreciate your candor. A good listener greatly helps in becoming a good communicator.

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You and Your Social Life

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Your crew of buds and close friends are a goldmine. They grant you access to a world of infinite possibilities. But sometimes, there are also those that annoy you to no end. When you go out, you check the crowd and see who you can get along with. Just keep your eyes constantly peeled because great friends are just an arm’s reach away. You tend to associate with people who are most like you, and when people say that you can tell a person’s personality just by looking at their group of friends, there’s truth to that. There’s more chemistry when you’re chatting up with a person you share social links with.

Of course, to get the friends who mold well with you, you also have to get yourself out there. Mingle, socialize, and open up your world. When it comes to your social life, being outgoing is a must, a very good thing to be. You have to show your true colors and stop pretending being someone else, even if you think that the character you’ve come up with is way cooler than you actually are. Verbalize your thoughts but remain tactful. Maintain your manners but don’t hide behind a mask. You give others a firmer idea of who you really are.

You must also realize that nobody’s perfect. You have your own quirks and if you want others to accept you for who you are, you also have to show the same kind of courtesy. So even if it seems at first sight that these are the kind of people you don’t hang out with, don’t be too quick to judge. Don’t shy away from meeting new faces, friends of friends, because sometimes, the most special connections are the ones who are most unexpected.

Keep a group of friends you love. Big group activities are also the best way to meet new people. There are those found at the edge of your social circle, and perhaps, you’ve just never given them the chance to talk to you. If you don’t get along with someone, don’t feel too pressured. Just relax and be at your best behavior so that you are more likely to enjoy the event. Parties are also good venues for getting to know interesting characters. You’ll end up with more friends than you can ever expect. And with your social life, more is definitely merrier.

Life is so much sweeter when you have more people you can count on. With someone to hold your hand during the toughest of times, you’ll be better equipped for each trial and tribulation. While some people are self-proclaimed hermits, they also look for company every now and then. You feel more when you have people who truly care for you. While relationships come and go, you must never forget the friends you have. They are your lifeline. So, when it seems as if you’re scraping through and hanging on by your fingernails, always turn to someone for support. While your problems won’t disappear overnight, they’re certainly more bearable.

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Bye-Bye Bad Habits

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Once your brain gets used to a routine, even a destructive one, it’s tough to shake free. A friend offers you a smoke whole you’re sipping your cocktail. You have a cigarette every now and then, and you’re hooked. So what’s the harm?  This is your brain battling a bad habit…and losing. As you continually perform a behavior, the neural pathways in your brains form new patterns. When a prompt arrives, such as the offer of a stick of nicotine, your brain shifts on autopilot. Situational cues bring out habits that are deeply embedded. These behaviors can be bad news and you need to break those bad habits pronto.

What if you’ve been chugging caffeine nonstop? When a coffee fanatic doesn’t get that fix, blood flow in the brain spikes. The expansion causes that annoying headache, while you also suffer from other nasty symptoms such as grumpiness and fatigue. You often visit the coffee shop to avoid this dilemma. A constant infusion can set your nerves on edge. High daily caffeine intake may decrease hand steadiness and increase anxiety. And when you consume more, you also increase your chances for diabetes. Break the habit by starting to write down every single thing you eat or drink for a few days to identify all the sources of caffeine. Soda, tea, and energy drinks are common culprits. Then, set to reduce your intake by about ten percent. You can also mix decaf with your full-strength coffee and slowly increase the ratio. Keep dialing back until your craving subsides.

How ‘bout if you take a quick drag every now and then? While regular smokers have a chemical component fueling their addiction, people who smoke only occasionally succumb mainly to social and environmental triggers. The most powerful prompt is often being around people who are smoking. Lighting up a few times is still poisoning yourself and there’s no lower limit of exposure to tobacco smoke that’s safe. Just one stick can injure the walls of your blood vessels, which can lead to heart and other problems. But benign cigarette substitutes can do wonders. Grab a drink stirrer and hold it between your fingers. Set it between your lips while you take out your wallet or phone. This keeps your hands and mouth busy. Carry nicotine gum or lozenges to help wean you off the addiction. Though these are healthier than cigarettes, they can be habit-forming as well. Practice restraint.

The bad habit that many aren’t aware that they have is laziness. Once or twice a week, it’s totally okay to grab some snacks and fire up the plasma in the evening. But if you do this every night, then you seriously have a problem. People who are under high levels of stress and who may not have a large network of friends are prone to isolation. To break this routine, decide which shows are a must-see. Get the DVD and watch at a later time. Zipping through commercials helps a lot. Make after-work plans as well. Join the gym or get into something.

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Issues on Love and Relationship

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Back in school, your teacher would ask you to make a Venn diagram. You draw two circles that represented two different entities, and in that area where the circles merge, you write in the common characteristics. This was often used in Math (for sets and subsets) and in stories (for the protagonist versus the antagonist). You must’ve thought that this wasn’t really useful. Well, you can finally put that thought to rest because you can use that knowledge in your relationship now. And when you’ve noticed that you’ve been clashing and rubbing each other the wrong way, then maybe it’s time to make the diagram and see where the two of you can finally meet and compromise.

The Venn diagram is a sort of visual aid that helps you solve those spats you’ve had lately. You can do this by yourself, and at least you know have an image in your head that will serve as your guide when you try to fix things. But before you start, you also have to come to a decision. Is the relationship worth saving? Is your man worth keeping? If it’s a resounding yes, keep your temper in check and think about the good things the two of you share. Sometimes, you have to run the show and be the mature one. When you’re calm about the situation, you’re more likely to come out of it triumphant.

Listen to him when he airs out his issues, and try to keep calm when he says something you may not necessarily agree with. Let him finish when it’s his turn to talk, and when you get to air out your thoughts, you can address the things he’s mentioned. Some of the issues may not be resolved immediately, and if you need time for it, then you have to set aside time for it. There’s also no shame in seeking help elsewhere. When emotions are involved, it’ll be hard for the two of you to be objective. So, talk to your man and let him see the good will come out when you get the help you need.

As for the smaller issues, you can both come up with a middle-ground. The decisions have to come from both parties and no one should feel coerced into doing something they don’t want. If you have reservations, air them out and tell them where you’re coming from. Also, try to see things from the other side as well. There are always two sides to every story, and the victor is always the person who sees both of it.

Remember that you shouldn’t be ashamed when you run into problems. Every relationship needs help, and disagreements will come up when two people are together often enough. If you can pass through all the bumps on the road, you’ll have something that’s stronger than ever. Just think about how things will be in the end, and muster up the courage to see your relationship through, even when things won’t always be pleasant.

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Moves that Enhance Your Relationship

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You’ve been through a series of nice and not so nice relationships, and of course, a string of mistakes you’ve made are just too many to mention. Now, you found the one, the person you want to spend the rest of your life with, but to make it work, you also have to work at it. Men are naturally up for changes, and women sometimes need to be coaxed. When certain changes in the household need to be made, it’s best that you both talk about it. Try to see each other’s point of view so that the romance is never lost when you disagree on something. When you’re asked why you’re so hesitant, mention what you feel needs to be done. Who knows, your parner might be agreeable to it. You’ll never know what will happen unless you speak your mind. They may jump the gun immediately, but if you’re patient about reminding them, they’ll pick up eventually.

Disparities will happen. You may be too busy to involve yourself in your man’s activities with other responsibilities to worry about. In order to find that happy medium, you need to set aside time to sit down and talk. If this takes the romance out of things, there’s also a lot to be said about scheduling. You won’t argue as often and when you do get to achieve something, the feeling of exhilaration is a reward in itself. And who says you can’t be romantic when you plan? Interject a few compliments and show him through body language that you like having him around.

And when it’s time for some together-time, let go of all other worries. Planning helps here because you’ll be able to take care of bills and work before you make those big plans. When you’re together, it’s important that you be comfortable. Play music in the background because this helps a lot in setting the mood without being too distracting. Free your mind and don’t become too inhibited. As a couple, it’s necessary that you establish harmony, and this requires that you spend time whenever you can. Of course, you also have your circle of friends to think about. You shouldn’t give up your life, but you also need to find that perfect balance. It’s part of the territory, and one that you must learn to deal with.

As much as you show your man that you love him, words are just as important. Express your feelings and let him know in words how much how you like him around. Not everyone is blessed with the gift of expression, but don’t be afraid. Even when you sound too cheesy, no one can punish you for how you really feel. Start with simple notes and short phone messages. You clue them in to the fact that you are open to them and that you have nothing to hide. You also feel less vulnerable when you get things out in the open. Soon, your man will learn to respond. People couldn’t be more mistaken when they say talk is cheap. It’s more priceless than you think.

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